A Method to the Madness
Today has been one of those days. It started out well. Beautiful day. Nice prayer walk. No headache, unlike yesterday. All in all, despite the enormous "to-do" list staring me down, I felt good about the day. . . until I left the house. Everywhere I went created a new sense of frustration and grief. This store didn't have what I was looking for. The next one did, but not in my size. One little errand took nearly 45 minutes and a whole lot more money than I was expecting. The next store was out of the one thing I needed. And the prescription I called in yesterday, well, the pharmacy had no idea what I was talking about. I'll have to go back later to pick that up. Aaauuuggghhh!
By the time I got home, I was hungry, tired and of course, in tears. I just wanted to run a couple of errands. I only needed to pick up a few things. And I had no intentions of spending as much money as I did. To be honest, I felt sick to my stomach. How had such a lovely day turned so topsy turvy in such a short amount of time?
As I cried out to the Lord in my despair, I remembered the words I had uttered during my prayer walk. Something to the effect of "but I won't quit, Lord. I'll keep on serving You even when things get hard." Hmm, I guess I'd better be more careful with my words. I don't know if the Lord was testing me to see if I really meant what I said or what, but I found myself uttering the following: "Lord, it's been a horrible day, but I meant what I said. I'm not going to quit. I'll try not to be frustrated and to trust that there is a method to this madness. I don't have a clue what you're doing, but as long as You do, I guess that's good enough for me."
I'd love to tell you that I felt better immediately, but the truth is that I didn't. I fussed a bit more and cried a few more tears, but after my emotions were spent, I realized that I was experiencing dejavu. How many times have I been in this situation (or similar)? How many times have I stressed out over things that were beyond my control? How many times have I questioned what God was doing? And yet, how many times have I later realized that God had a plan all along? Go figure, there was a method to the madness after all.
So, as I go about the remainder of my day, I will strive to focus on Him rather than on the craziness around me. I will concentrate on His words rather than the frustrations that continue to creep in. And above all, I will trust that none of this morning's happenings caught Him by surprise. Though I faced the unexpected, He certainly did not, yet He allowed me to walk through the valley anyway. That tells me I'm right where He wants me to be, and in this place, He is working all things for my good.
No need to stress! God has everything under control.
Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy. - I Peter 4:12-13