Keeping the Faith During Divorce - A Guest Post by Edson Senna
Sadly, divorce is fairly common these days, even in Christian marriages. And while we know that divorce is a decision that many people face, we often avoid discussing divorce because of differing views and the uncomfortable nature of the subject. For those who have chosen to divorce, the stress and uncertainty can make it hard to keep the faith and stay close to God. If you have prayerfully made the decision to divorce, consider these suggestions to strengthen your faith during this difficult time.
1. Continue to Pray
Prayer is how we communicate with God, and he is the only one who truly knows you and your situation. Pray for help from God for yourself, but also for your spouse, children, and other family members. Divorce is painful for all involved and may bring unexpected challenges.
As you stay close to God through prayer, you can receive guidance about how to help those involved to heal and move forward. It is sometimes hard to pray during our challenges, but constant communication with God will be a great strength for you. When you don’t feel like praying, pray anyway.
2. Attend Church
In addition to communicating with God, you must continue to worship him in order to maintain a close relationship with him. Attending church may be intimidating; there may be some around you who will judge your decision to divorce. Remember that it is not our place to judge our fellowman; God has reserved that right for himself.
Do not let others’ decision to judge you affect your relationship with God. At the end of the day, your relationship with him is the only one that matters. Offense is a choice; choose not to be offended. As you continue to worship, you will find friends within your church who will support you and help you through this difficult time.
3. Serve Others
Service provides an opportunity to look outside of ourselves and heal our hearts and others’. Look for ways to serve those around you. In serving, we follow Jesus’ example; he spent his entire life helping others.
Serving also helps us realize our own worth. God has given each of us many gifts and he wants us to use these gifts to bless the lives of our neighbors. In 1 Peter 4:10 we read, “As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.” Divorce often brings feelings of failure and inadequacy. Serving others will help you to see that God still values you and wants you to help others of his children.
4. Practice Charity
It is natural to feel angry or resentful of one’s spouse during a divorce, and it can be tempting to speak harshly to and about that person. Pray for the strength to resist this temptation, and remember that Jesus taught that we should do good to all men and love our enemies. Do not ridicule your spouse, publicly or privately. Doing so will widen the rift between you and will affect your children. Charity is a gift from God; as you practice and pray for charity, God will bless you with more.
In the scriptures, charity is often associated with faith and hope. Pray for the faith that God is with you and the hope that you will be able to live a full and happy life.
5. Ask for Help
God does not expect us to go through our challenges alone. He places people and organizations in our lives to help us through challenging times. Turn to your pastor or a professional counselor for help in knowing how to move forward. Talking about your feelings can help the healing process. Allow friends to help you as well. Turn to friends who will uplift you and strengthen your faith. You may worry about being a burden, but remember that when others serve you God blesses them in their own challenges. Allow God to help you through others.
Each person who goes through a divorce will have a unique experience and will struggle at some point. It is important to stay close to God during this time. Only he can truly heal you and those involved.
Edson Senna is a freelance writer who loves sharing his faith through his writing. In addition to writing about faith and family matters, Edson specializes in finance and law. He sometimes does consulting for Dexter Law, divorce lawyers in Utah. In his spare time, Edson enjoys reading, biking, and running.